Tolarian Community College: 4 Years, 250,000 Subscribers, And A Real Office

* Voice babbles over phone *
Yes, yes, actually I am quite salty right now. I am exceptionally salty. I am most high sodium. Because the working conditions that you provide for me are completely unacceptable, and I’ve had it. I’ve just had it. I quit! I’m going to take that job at Scrubland Community College! They begged me, and I’m finally going to take it. * voice babbles over phone *
What’s wrong? This office is what’s wrong! It is too small. It’s cramped. I can’t work like this! It’s a mess! I have nowhere to put my things. And also, there’s sentient mould living in these walls, and it smells like homelands in here. Terrible I –
* voice babbles over phone * I don’t have a storage closet available in my office. What do you –
* voice babbles over phone * No, there is no storage closet in the corner. I can see the coroners, all the corners, and there’s nothing in them. There’s nothing there, nothing there, nothing there, and there’s certainly no closet in this corner at all, just my bookcase, and oh well, I guess there’s that space kind of behind the bookcase, but that’s it. It’s just a little crawl space or something. I don’t know, the bookcase was here when I moved in * voice babbles over phone *
No, it’s not the closet blocked by the bookcase, that’s ridiculous. It’s just a little space. * voice babbles over phone *
Urgh, alright, I’m going to move the bookcase just to prove this. Uh, I’ll call you back. Oh! There is actually a space! Yes, we are banning Felidar Guardian! * laughs * Magic Online? The deck will be grief, misery and the fun police – a term which here means; grief and misery. They’ve gone too far, Prof. The consulate has gone too far and they need to be stopped. Forget my kids, it’s all about the cube. Is Wizards of the Coast printing too many supplemental products? I say, no! It moves more product, which makes the local game store a lot more money. Channel Fireball has to care about their public image, and if they’re seen to be taking advantage of this monopoly to raise GP prices across the board, they will suffer hugely for it, and I don’t think they’re stupid enough to do that. You still have a few seconds left on the clock there, Jeff. You can take those extra seconds and add them to your standard legality “Her commander deck… is superfriends!” Pass! “Just like all of us!” Paaaaasssssssss Drink it all! Sometimes the poison sinks to the bottom. Dude, we’ve been playing Magic all we at PAX. I said my name at least six times. Will you sign my play mat??